Download PDF Blackout: Remembering the things I drank to forget By Sarah Hepola

Download PDF Blackout: Remembering the things I drank to forget By Sarah Hepola

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Blackout: Remembering the things I drank to forget-Sarah Hepola

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Ebook About
'Extraordinary... Writing with warmth and wit' Independent'It's such a savage thing to lose your memory, but the crazy thing is, it doesn't hurt one bit. A blackout doesn't sting, or stab, or leave a scar when it robs you. Close your eyes and open them again. That's what a blackout feels like.'For Sarah Hepola, alcohol was 'the gasoline of all adventure'. She spent her evenings at cocktail parties and dark bars where she proudly stayed till last call. Drinking felt like freedom, part of her birthright as an enlightened twenty-first-century woman.But there was a price. She often blacked out, waking up with a blank space where four hours should be. Mornings became detective work on her own life. What did I say last night? How did I meet that guy?Publicly, she covered her shame with self-deprecating jokes, and her career flourished, but as the blackouts accumulated, she could no longer avoid a sinking truth. The fuel she thought she needed was draining her spirit instead.THE NEW YORK TIMES BESTELLERA memoir of unblinking honesty and poignant, laugh-out-loud humour, BLACKOUT is the story of a woman stumbling into a new adventure-the sober life she never wanted. Shining a light into her blackouts, she discovers the person she buried, as well as the confidence, intimacy, and creativity she once believed came only from a bottle. Her tale will resonate with anyone who has been forced to reinvent themselves or struggled in the face of necessary change. It's about giving up the thing you cherish most-but getting yourself back in return.A raw, vivid and ultimately uplifting memoir of addiction and recovery for anyone who is looking to find their way.

Book Blackout: Remembering the things I drank to forget Review :



This was the first book I ordered for myself after I became sober. I had had so many blackouts and thought I could identify with the author. As I read and kept reading, it was like the whole pattern kept repeating itself over and over. Relapse after relapse and the story would start over again. I am not saying anything bad about the author, and I hope she found a way to stay sober (I didn't finish the book), but I was looking for encouragement and it wasn't that. I truly would not recommend this book to someone who is newly sober and looking for help to stay that way. . Everyone thinks differently, of course, but I would suggest this book only for those who are strong in their sobriety and are up for the story of someone who struggled for many years. I found at that point in my life, I needed books that offered more hope and ways to work on staying sober. Thankfully, there are many books on the subject, and I found the ones that worked for me.
As recovering alcoholic myself, I've read all the "women alcoholic" memoirs I could get my hands on, but Hepola's voice and and experience is the first I've read that truly mirrors the drinking culture that exists for those of us born in the mid-70s to mid-80s."In an age of sex tapes and beaver shots, there was nothing edgy or remotely shocking about a woman like me reporting that, hey, everyone, I fell off my bar stool."Hepola captures the classic problems alcoholics have always faced--the "gerrymandering of what constitutes an actual 'problem'," the strained relationships, the blacking out--but she does so for a generation of "young, educated, and drunk" women who find power in drinking, who are sexually liberated, who forgo having kids to chase their dreams, who like being in charge of their own pain.Throughout the book, Hepola wrestles with the troubling sexual interactions she had while drunk. "I spent years wondering if I'd lost my virginity, and if I'd consented..." "Many yesses on Friday nights would have been nos on Saturday morning. My consent battle was in me." "When men are in a blackout, they do things to the world. When women are in a blackout, things are done to them." While I was quick to pinpoint sexual violation as the reason for my own drinking, I appreciated that Heppola explored some of the deeper issues of why people, especially women, drink. And why it's so hard to leave behind.While Hepola wrestles with why she ended up where she did, she never blames anyone or anything for her circumstances and she found the strength within herself to make a better life. Unlike a lot of alcohol memoirs, Blackout doesn't simply just end at drinking one day and sober the next. Hepola lets readers join in on the complicated first years of sobriety to see how the process of leaving oneself and finding oneself intertwines to build a whole person.I highly recommend Blackout to anyone who wants to learn about the life of an alcoholic woman (or any addiction) and find hope that recovery is possible--and also to anyone who has struggled with finding themselves, being comfortable in their own bodies, knowing how to balance expectations of potential with reality. Hepola's brutal honesty of her own insecurities, confusion, grandiosity, and vanity left me grateful that I got to spend a little bit of time in her head to learn a few things about myself.

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